Day 15 Two Weeks Until Mini 1

I have two weeks until Mini 1.  Am I ready, hellll no.  Will I be ready?  Probably not.  How can I be?  I can do everything I possibly can, and still not be ready.  This is going to be a test like no other test I have taken.  This is for real.  There is no more, "When I finally get there, it'll be different."  Its here.  My mind is racing a million miles an hour.  What's important?  How can I possibly learn all of this?  There is no way he's gonna ask that...right?  The stress of this situation is so different from anything that I have ever faced.  The sense of urgency.  Do I worry about failing?  Or do I block it out because I know I'm gonna pass?  What if I have a bad test day?  What will I change?  Do I have to think about that?  Should I have a plan just in case?  But thats a distraction, is it a necessary one?  I have two weeks to figure all of this out, to be mentally, physically, emotionally, and psychologically prepared for this.  I must be rolling on all cylinders to accomplish what I must accomplish.  I'm nervous.  I am.  No question about it, but for what might be the first time in my life I feel I am able to use this wound up energy for good.  It gives me a lil boost in motivation to watch that last lecture of the day, to read through the notes one more time.  Its new.  Two weeks.  Fourteen days.  I'll blink and it'll be here, but in that blink I will work harder than I've ever worked.  I will not fail.  I grew up my entire life knowing I was better than you...ah, it sounded right when I was typing...but X that out.  I grew up my entire life knowing what I was capable of, and in two weeks, I'll have my first true test to show it.     

Today is Memorial Day.  Well in the States at least.  This is the first Memorial Day in forever that I haven't had Dad's special NINE course meal.  Jimmy Buffet in the background.  First course: Grey Goose martini;  Second course: grilled homemade pizza; Third course: shrimp cocktail; Fourth course: Johnny Blue; Fifth course: tuna in a wasabi sauce; Sixth course: amazing salad; Seventh course: more Johnny; Eighth course: fall of the bone BBQ ribs, grilled asparagus and zucchini, BBQ chicken; Ninth round: Saunder's Ice Cream Sundae with coffee and Kalula.  Instead, I go to Tomato's, where they don't have their ribs, can't make my second choice (Beef Lasagna) because the power was out on the whole island and the MICROWAVE they use to cook the lasagna doesn't work with their generator, so I have to settle for 4mushroom ravioli (which comes with FIVE ravioli) with a lettuce salad and a piece of bread.  I then bring the food back to my place and proceed to eat alone, in the pitch dark (the sun goes down at 6pm, it is 730pm) with a Diet A&W root beer.  MMM HMMM.  With everything from the above paragraph on my mind.  What a night...